Davison's Doodle

My Friend Thomas

I was gifted the trust of the pulpit at Central Christian Church in Enid, OK last Sunday, April 11th. This is the written text of my words as I explored John 20:19-31, the traditional Lectionary reading for the first Sunday in Easter.

Disciples, may the peace of God be with you. 

Thank you for blessing your minister with time away. Like many of his colleagues, Tom added producer, director, sound engineer, lighting engineer, key grip, whatever that is, and editor to his call to ministry as well as preacher, teacher, pastor, and prophet.  Ministers are tired and most days during the pandemic it is not “good” tired. 

Thank you Tom, and the elders, for the trust of the pulpit.

Central, thank you for being an active participant in the covenant we call the Christian Church In Oklahoma.  Together, we are the Church grounded in prayer, guided by scripture, and called to serve.

My first visit to a congregation as a member of the (Oklahoma) Regional staff was here at Central in September 2010.  Today, you are my first in person visit to a congregation since the coronavirus began infecting our part of the world in March of last year.  Like the Disciples of long ago, most of us have been behind our doors living with disbelief, fear, disappointment, worries, and doubt wondering what it will be like when we go out.  Thinking about getting back to normal or back to before.  Those are appropriate, reasonable, emotions for times like these.

And still . . .
Life found a way.  
Religious and non-religious people of all kinds found a way. 
Disciples found a way.

Central, you have found ways to continue responding to the needs of your community and to one another.  You have adapted presence: digital sacred space, zooming bible study and meetings.  Welcome Table meals to go.  Curbside communion. Physical space, masks, and hand sanitizer oh my.

And, you are part of a larger community, the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) that found a way. The Region helped clergy and congregations adapt to technology.  The Region and the Week of Compassion have responded to needs caused by the weather, the pandemic, and by human neglect. The work of making justice happen goes on and we all have been humbled, or found humility in our journey in faith.

It’s not been easy. Failure can be the best teacher if you pay attention.  The tough times are not over, and “before” might not be as good as we remember or necessary to revive.  Realize it or not.  Like it or not. You’ve changed.  I’ve changed.  We have changed.  Like Thomas we’ve shouted, “My Lord” or whispered “My God.”

And, like the disciples of long ago we have to consider, “what do we do now?”

Let us pray.  Open our ears and our hearts, O God, that our words, meditations, and living will reflect our faith in You, who creates, redeems, and sustains our lives.  Amen.

Buckle up church. Here we go.

There is a story about a minister who was speaking to a group of second graders about the resurrection of Jesus when one student asked, “What did Jesus say when he came out of the tomb?” The minister explained that the gospels have a lot of details, but really not much about what Jesus said when he came out of the tomb.  There was a short silence, and the hand of one little boy shot up.  “I know what he said. Ta Da!!!!”

In our calendar it has been a week since the events of Easter.  In John’s gospel we don’t know how much time has passed since Mary Magdalene and the other women shared the news.  Peter has run to the tomb and back.  Just like Mary said, it was empty.  What did that mean?  What does that mean today?  

The disciples have kept a low profile in their community.  The other gospels tell us that some have gone back to the lives they knew before meeting Jesus of Nazareth.  It is what some of us do when we are grieving — stay busy, try to go back to the familiar, or after the crowds and family leave, hide at home.  If it were not for Mary Magdalene and a few nameless others there would be no resurrection story.  Even though they spoke, few listened and believed them.  There were good reasons to doubt the stories about Jesus and what his followers had given their lives to, no matter how many cameo appearances Jesus made.

Our world is awash in doubt right now.  There is a general acceptance that as a verb doubt means something or someone is questionable, or distrusted, or feared. (Dictionary.com)

As a noun doubt means something like a feeling of uncertainty about the truth, reality, or nature of something or someone. (Dictionary.com)

I think it is the motivation of doubt that makes all the difference.

In our culture doubt and cynicism have become synonymous verbs that fuel a tribalism and political culture that impugns the character or principles of those with whom we disagree or distrust.  I think it is important to remember that a person’s pattern of behavior tells the real story no matter what they proclaim theologically or politically in any given moment.  That’s why the parables that Jesus told continue to teach all these centuries later.   

This cynical doubt creates its own facts, history, and counter narrative that cannot be questioned; cannot be doubted.  That cynical doubt has found its way into all kinds of public places and religious life.

Remember, when Mary Magdalene and the other women tell the disciples about seeing Jesus the gospels show us a mixed response.  In Luke we are told, “But they did not believe the women because their words seemed to them like nonsense.”  In Mark the women fled the tomb and told no one because they were afraid.  Matthew does not tell us about their encounter with the disciples, and in the gospel of John the disciples do not respond to Mary’s witness at all.  Then there is this story about my friend Thomas.  “Unless I touch the nail prints in his hands, I will not believe.”

The story is told about a mom who asked her six year old daughter to get a can of soup from the pantry. She replied, “But mom it’s scary and dark in the pantry.”  “You don’t have to be afraid.” came her mother’s calm reply.  She continued. “Remember at vacation bible school you learned that Jesus is always with you.  He will be with you even in the pantry.”  The girl thought for a moment.  Walked to the pantry, opened the door and called out, “Hey Jesus, if you’re in there could you hand me a can of soup.”

The disciples are hidden away, behind locked doors, and Jesus came and stood among them.  It had to have been an overwhelming, exciting, fear-filled, doubt-filled moment. You can imagine Peter looking at the others and say, “You seeing this?”  Jesus tells the disciples, in that room and this one, that they are to continue the ministry that he began.  The gospel writer picks up the symbolism of the breath of God and Jesus exhales the Holy Spirit on the disciples in that room and in this one.  Then Jesus gives the disciples a responsibility that I would rather leave to God’s wisdom, “If you forgive anyone their sin it is forgiven, and if you do not forgive them they are not forgiven.” 

I doubt Jesus ever said those words with the doctrinal intent that orthodox Christianity has applied them.  To me it sounds like Jesus is providing his ID, proving he is who he claimed to be by helping the disciples in that room and in this one, remember those teaching stories that create doubt about the way we are living.

• Forgive seventy times seven?
• Love God and your neighbor as yourself.
• Pray for my enemies and those that persecute me?
• The last will be first and the first last?

Where is Thomas while all of this is going on?  Why wasn’t he with the disciples?  Was he an essential worker?  We don’t know.  Thomas is generally thought of in a negative way, the great doubter of the risen Jesus. Christian tradition tends to forget that the rest of the disciples didn’t believe until they saw Jesus as well.  For some reason Thomas has gotten a bad rap throughout the centuries.  You know the phrase, “Don’t be a doubting Thomas.”  

I heard this phrase from my mother more than once when I was a child.  To hear her tell it I was the king of, “but why?”  For some reason Christian tradition equates doubt with having weak or little faith.  But why?  Our lives are immersed in skepticism, doubt, and we hold some of these to be very important.  Christianity teaches us to love our neighbor as ourselves and respect all humanity. But, we teach children, “Don’t talk to strangers.”  We doubt a stranger could have our best interest in mind, and usually, we are suspicious if someone we don’t know wants to help us.  There is that little voice, you know the one that asks, “What is this person hoping to gain from helping me?”  Is this just a good . . . Samaritan?  Doubt can be a layer of protection.   Who gets the “benefit of the doubt” in your life?   Who has earned the benefit of the doubt, at least once, in your life?

Maybe Thomas, our Twin, has gotten a bad reputation because we want to believe that when you meet Jesus, life becomes more clear, more certain, less conflicted, and choices become easier.  For some, maybe it does, but what I’ve experienced and observed is that following Jesus makes living more complicated.  Jesus’ way creates reasonable doubt about what matters most in a world where everything matters.

Blogging about this text, Nancy Rockwell writes: 
“What Thomas is asking for is proof that Jesus is not just alive, but still loves. Because what would be the point, if Jesus had come back angry?”
(Nancy Rockwell, “A Bite at the Apple Blog.” Patheos.com.)

I embrace the skepticism of Thomas as a positive quality.

Don’t misunderstand.  I am not suggesting questions for questioning sake or to respond to every answer with a child’s cadence, “but why?”   

Siblings in faith, if you can’t have doubts and express them with those who are closest to you within the community of faith, then where can you have healthy doubt?  To do that requires trust in the relationships that matter.

In his book, Wishful Thinking, Frederick Buechner writes:
“Whether your faith is that there is a God or that there is not a God, if you don’t have any doubts, you are either kidding yourself or asleep. Doubts are the ants in the pants of faith. They keep it awake and moving.”
(Frederick Buechner, Wishful Thinking. Harper and Row (New York) 1973.)

The first disciples asked questions about their religious traditions, about the symbols, the civic rules, and from those questions about what was important, the life and death of Jesus of Nazareth was resurrected into the Christ of faith.  Healthy doubt has kept the Church alive and relevant for a long time.  

I am convinced that people don’t doubt their faith, they ask questions about their belief.  Faith, it seems to me, is the experience that draws a person to God.  It is a grounding experience, of hope or love or acceptance or awe or something else.  Faith is that DNA instinct to feel inspiration or connected to the source of being, to God, however one wishes to name God.  I don’t think that can be lost.  Thomas shows us that it can be misplaced or forgotten or ignored or hidden, but not lost. The image of God is in our genetic code.

In working out beliefs we give meaning and explanation to faith.  When we have doubts or ask questions, we are engaged in the growth process.  It is a necessary experience more than once in life.  One of the best and most frightening moments in life is when one’s experience and beliefs conflict.  It is then when one asks, “Do my beliefs make sense?  Not, “Do my beliefs make me feel better about myself or the way I live?”

Christian tradition and Church history are riddled with doubt.  The Jerusalem Council and Paul argued over what the Gentiles must do to be considered, “Christian.”  In 325 CE the Council at Nicea tried to end doubt through the establishment of official Christian belief in the form of the Nicene Creed.

Martin Luther nailed pages to a door refuting official Christian belief and practice in his time.  Abolitionists doubted the argument of their day that the bible supported slavery.  

Our denomination was birthed out of the doubt that creeds unite, and communion is meant only for those that agree with the creed or baptized in the specific congregation where one worships.  

When the Church has no more challenges for itself, or for the followers of Jesus, or for culture, it becomes a salt that has lost its taste.  It is co-opted by culture, or by government, set in its’ privilege in culture, and it does not provide a relevant witness of the good news of God to the world.

Thomas, like some Christians, is looking for empirical proof, an existential guarantee, or a theological certainty; and what Jesus offers, what the Christ of faith offers, is presence.

Presence with an abundance of grace.  
Presence that lives as if the kindom (empire) of God is here, right now, even as it is still not fully yet known.  
Presence that embraces, connects, and speaks truth to all kinds of power.  
Presence in the midst of doubt.  

When Jesus appeared, Thomas is transformed and his doubt is reconciled. 
Jesus responds, “Have you believed because you have seen?”

Each time we worship and serve together pentecost moments can happen that bring about reconciliation and transformation.   

Who has to walk through the door of the sanctuary, or the door at home, or the door to your heart to transform your doubt or faith?  

Maybe it’s safer to ask Jesus for a can of soup.

Jesus did many other signs in the presence of the disciples which are not written in the gospels. 
They are written on your heart.  
They are proclaimed in our patterns of behavior.  

Blessed are you . . . 

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And, here are my words from Sunday on video. The begin at 24:38 in the video from Central Christian Church.