Inauguration Day 2021
The day after the inauguration of the forty-sixth President. I don’t know what you saw and heard. Like four years ago, and most of my lifetime, I was uncomfortable with the religious overtones. It was a better representation of mainline Christianity. The petitions to the Divine were more inclusive than those of four years ago and less theologically Dominionism, but I was uncomfortable with the Christian-centric posture.
I’m working on kindness today.
It began in fifth grade. As a short kid with red hair, freckles, and rather big front teeth, I was an easy target for the bullies. I know that when humor, persuasion, compassion, and avoidance don’t work you have to face the bully and knock him, her, it, on its backside hard and stand over it. You have to do it in front of the crowd that benefited from the bully, was too afraid to stand up against it, and the bystanders. You need to hear the bully yell ‘uncle’ in front of everyone and show it for what it is. And then, help it up. In rare moments, you can happen along and help the bully in its, her, or his frightened moment. Sometimes the shock of being helped for no reason, and specifically when you haven’t earned help, can change the conversation and behavior. I don’t know what extending kindness to those in Congress that tried to overturn the election looks like.
I enjoy team sport and individual sport. Growing up, I played some baseball, basketball, and was on the tennis team. There were times that I was a “poor sport” when I lost. There were excuses. The ball was well off the plate, the refs were in the tank for the other team, or the dishonesty of the other player calling the lines. Early in high school I had a bad episode on the tennis court during a weekend tournament. My parents were watching. I saw them leaving as I was in mid-tirade. It didn’t stop my behavior that day. I lost in straight sets. At home my parents explained to me their feelings of embarrassment and disappointment. My mother’s favorite phrase, “I know we raised you better than that. At this age you are responsible for your behavior.” They supported my high school tennis career and encouraged me, but didn’t come to another tournament until my senior year. I don’t know what accountability looks like for those in Congress that tried to overturn the election. Do they get to just go on like nothing happened?
I like competition and collaboration. Both are important. I would like the Nation to have less “debate” and more “conversation.” The presumes good faith listening and being open to persuasion. A colleague recently noted, “It seems like no one can be persuaded. Both sides simply want to watch the other burn under the fury of God’s wrath.” I’ve not always listened well. I’ve held you to the same level of consistency and accountability as I have myself. Is that fair? The arguments, memes, and easy beer muscles of social media of this last decade have made many of us poor sports and poor fans. I’m guilty. You?
What acts of kindness have you noticed recently?
[The Daily Question, gratefulness.org. January 17, 2021]
There is the kindness of ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’ And the kindness of “I was wrong, I’m sorry.” The small kindnesses that smooth our interactions and help other people feel as though you’re aware of them. These don’t cost us much, in fact, in most settings, engaging with kindness is an essential part of connection, engagement and forward motion.
And then there is the kindness of dignity. Of giving someone the benefit of the doubt. The kindness of seeing someone for the person that they are and can become, and the realization that everyone, including me and you, has a noise in our heads, a story to be told, fear to be danced with and dreams to be realized.
And there’s another: The kindness of not seeking to maximize short-term personal gain. The kindness of building something for the community, of doing work that matters, of finding a resilient, anti-selfish path forward.
Kindness isn’t always easy or obvious, because the urgent race to the bottom, to easily measured metrics and to scarcity, can distract us. But bending the arc toward justice, toward dignity and toward connection is our best way forward.
Kindness multiplies and it enables possibility. When we’re of service to people, we have the chance to make things better.
Seth Godin, January 18, 2021
“Once God has spoken; twice have I heard this: that power belongs to God,
and steadfast love belongs to you, O Lord. For you repay to all according to their work.” [Psalm 62:11-12]
You reap what you sow? Sometimes no. Sometimes yes. Sometimes you simply glean from the field, but you are still responsible for what you do with it.
Did you hear the youth poet laureate yesterday at the inauguration? Click here for the spoken word and to read the poem.