Never cut what you can untie

National Lampoons Christmas Vacation, 1989

The shortest of the books on my reading list for my sabbatical seasons is From Father to Son by Allen Appel (1993). My father gave me this book in December 1993, and with apologies to Pop, I just now read it all the way through. From Father to Son, shares wisdom solicited from different men that their father’s passed to them while growing up that the author curated into this little book. It is a book helping him grieve his father’s death and celebrate his life as well. Maybe that is why I couldn’t read it until now. The awareness is always there, life is fragile and short. My companion’s melanoma was caught early and treated. Remember your sunscreen! My father’s quadruple bypass surgery was successful following a heart cath. When it comes to health situations, my immediate family has been fortunate to have few issues thus far. I live in the southern midwest where it seems cancer of all kinds is everywhere. (Alert: snarky aside. But hey, let’s keep pumping fracking water back into the earth. Cancer, like oil and natural gas, has been around a long, long time. It’s just the cost of doing business.)

My mother pronounced at Thanksgiving dinner some time ago that “you never stop parenting no matter how old your kids get”. Given the helicopter nature of parents today that statement is more true now than for previous generations. Serving in youth ministry, I’ve witnessed my share of healthy and unhealthy parental relationships with their children. I haven’t done the research, but I imagine there is are similar books or (blogs) that share wisdom from mother to daughter. I wonder what my sister knows?

The afternoon I left for college, my mother made sure I knew how to iron a shirt. “Do it like this. Now you try. Remember, you can do the whole thing or if you are wearing a jacket, you can only iron what people will see.” My mother’s advice to me as I am leaving for college. “Your dad and I raised you right. We did our part. You do your part. We love you. Don’t do something to embarrass the family”. And my father’s words, that I’ve shared with parents from time to time during youth ministry. “Congratulations. You are going to college. We are proud of you. Always come home and visit, but don’t come home to live for any length of time. Call us if you need help”.

Here are a few of my favorites from the book that remain relevant today. And remember, the masculine language is quoted advice given from a father to a son. These could just as easily be read, “person”.

Never cut what you can untie.

Honesty without charity is mistaking the idol for the God.

Don’t trust a man that will lie for you. He’ll just as easily lie to you.

It doesn’t hurt to pray for miracles, but I wouldn’t waste much time on it. 
Save prayers for thank-you’s.

What a braggart goes on about having the most of is usually just those areas where he is most deficient.

Don’t be so positive of your own morality.  
Eating human flesh is a virtue in cannibal country.

Don’t judge a man’s character by the size of the Bible he carries.

You’ll be amazed at how many people can have absolutely ridiculous or immoral beliefs and still get through the day without any problems. Don’t try to enlighten them, they’re doing fine without your help.

Season 1

Is it, “life imitates art” or “art imitates life”? Oscar Wilde’s philosophical musing in, The Decay of Lying – An Observation (1891), is an ongoing subconscious discussion, but it seems to me in the 21st century it is a serious blend of both. Maybe it has always been this way.

If you have read along, you know I completed my writing projects with the exception of a curriculum called, “Welcome to Worship”, which I’ve yet to mention. I’m bumping that to summer reruns. Another activity during this first season, formerly known as “segment 1”, of my sabbatical was catching up on some entertainment programming. The technical term is “binge watching”. (Insert here a nostalgic aside about TV during my lifetime, and SNL’s Millennial Millions gameshow sketch this month where they highlight the economic realities and attitudes of Boomers, GenX, and Millennials.) I’m a GenX’er.

Since the late 1990’s, the entertainment awards season reminds me how siloed I’ve become about TV, music, and of late movies. I’m losing my ability to deal with people in the theater, you know, people that talk to the screen like they are in their own home and other quirky behavior. Is that a symptom of decaying society . . . the inability to deal with other people, or am I just aging? And, the choices. If you missed shows that are no longer “on air” there is always Hulu, Netflix, or Amazon assuming your bandwidth will support it. Or you may have a cable package with TV Land or another channel running the classics. What makes an era of entertainment the “Golden Age”?

Shows and Movies I’ve watched:
The Kominsky Method (Netflix)
First Man
Solo: A Star Wars Story
Always
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (Amazon Prime)
Avengers: Infinity War
Bruce Springsteen on Broadway (Netflix)

It is important to note that all of these have language and some content that may offend, probably will offend, with the exception of “Always”, “Solo”, the “Avengers” and “First Man”. Though, the end of “Avengers: Infinity War” was somewhat offensive. For the wildly offensive and sarcastic don’t miss “DeadPool 2”. For a glimpse into our current political situation, (walls, racism, and economics), I suggest “Gangs of New York”. I also watched some things I haven’t seen in a long, long time. The pilot for Star Trek: Enterprise. The pilot for Star Trek: The Next Generation. The film M*A*S*H, as well as several seasons of the TV show. Which leads me to my Sabbatical Season 1 cliffhanger: will I get through my sabbatical reading list?

Born to Run
Bruce Springsteen’s autobiography.

iGen: Why Today’s Super-Connected Kids Are Growing Up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy–and Completely Unprepared for Adulthood–and What That Means for the Rest of Us
Jean M. Twenge

Will Our Children Have Faith
John H. Westerhoff
This is a book I revisit each year that was foundational reading for Religion majors during my time at TCU.

A Walk in the Woods
Bill Bryson
I saw this film during my Thanksgiving break.

Amusing Ourselves to Death: Public Discourse in the Age of Show Business
Neil Postman

From Father to Son: Wisdom for the Next Generation
Allen Appel

Leading Change: Church Leadership Amid Turmoil (dvd)
Dr. Peter L. Steinke